Just Venting: Nothing Uplifting

I haven't been in contact for awhile so I thought I'd post. I haven't been able to run lately and everyone has been sick. We're starting to feel better, but I still haven't had a chance to run. There's no way I can keep up with my SAHM group who is running/walking a 5K on the 20th and I still haven't found a babysitter. I've got to work on that. My dad is visiting this week so I certainly haven't been eating well. I tried on my dress for the wedding at the end of this month and I look terrible. It's not just me that thinks it either. My sister-in-law couldn't really say anything nice about it. She's a nice gal, but she can't really lie.

I'd like to dig a big hole and crawl in it, and I'm ashamed to admit it. I know I have to crawl out of this funk I've been in. I've been so busy. I know it's just what every mom has to go through. It seems like I'm always doing something--dishes, laundry, sweeping, paying bills, ect. When I'm not doing something, I'm making a mental list of things I need to do. Some nights I go to bed and my back and feet ache so bad it takes forever to go to sleep. Evan hasn't been sleeping well so I'm functioning on 4-5 hours sleep. I miss sleep. LOL. I don't think any mom gets the prescribed 8 hours. We had family visiting and they were all in the livingroom and I was in the kitchen cleaning. I knew if I didn't do it then, I would have to stay up later and do it (which isn't really an option considering I hardly sleep right now).

Thanks for letting me vent. I swear I'm not always a grumpy girl. I'm just disappointed in myself and it carries over into every aspect of my life. I sure wish I was 30 lbs thinner, but I haven't taken the necessary steps to do it (hence the disappointment). It is within my control to change my life for the better.

I need to get out and do stuff with people again. I've been working at Wright and trying to get ready for my dad's visit and the upcoming wedding. It seems like time is flying. Tanya, would you be interested in running Wednesday afternoon this week? I work Wednesday and Thursday so I'll be in Tulsa. I could meet you for a run anytime around 3 or so. I know it's not likely considering you probably need to be home when you children get home from school, but I thought I'd ask. :-)

Miss you SAHM girls. Good job on running. I really am proud of you! You're the only reason I haven't quit by now. I'm going to try and run tonight when Jarred gets home (about 30 minutes from now). I don't know how far I'll get, but I've got to try.

TTYL